Play it again....

A friend has asked me to play sax and flute in a band to accompany our local amateur dramatics troupe. I was chuffed, even though she let slip that the two other two players she'd asked before me had turned it down. Still! Three years ago, the sax was consigned to many an attic as I moved from flat to flat. And now it's being played relentlessly as I try to get the show's darn songs into my head.

It's Me and My Girl. I have the CD and play it constantly in the hope that my brain will absorb it by some process of osmosis. And it's worrying, playing the same thing over and over. The kind of behaviour that's a small step away from wearing your bra on top of your coat. I'm sure I once read about some maniac who viciously attacked a neighbour because she'd been playing Whitney Houston's 'I Will Always Love You' around 800 times a day. I find myself humming the more recognisable tunes - Leaning on a Lamppost, The Sun Has Got His Hat On etc - whilst queuing in shops. God help me if I start doing The Lambeth Walk in public. In our small community, that kind of behaviour can get you on the cover of the Lanark Gazette.

Another stressy aspect: when to practise? We're in the midst of Easter hols (still!) so little chance during the day. At the first sax-honk my daughter starts pounding her piano, trying to drown out the horror of it all. I could get up at 6 am, but what kind of traumatic effect would that have on impressionable children? Ditto late at night. Unless I muffle the sax by stuffing it full of jumpers.

Which, unless I can get these songs together over the next three weeks, might be a wise tactic on opening night...